Happiness is Infectious

 

This image makes my day!

8 Indoor Activities for Wheelchair bound Elderlies

8 Wholesome Indoor Activities for Seniors on Wheelchairs

During our weekly date with my parents, I would usually bring them the park for Vitamin D sunlight, shopping or meals at random restaurants.

Since I become a trainer 2 years ago, I make an effort to plan engaging wholesome activities for my parents. I try to include activities which stretch their brain cells and practice their fine motor skills while we spend quality time together.

Both of my aging parents require wheelchair to move around, hence the activities selected have to take this in consideration.

I find that it is easier to plan indoor activities for mum as there are more varieties of sit-down activities for females. Ladies can do flower arrangement, sewing, origami, beading, cake decoration, art and crafts... The list goes on... but there are limited tools for our elderly men. This is especially obvious when they are not highly educated. Sudoku, crossword puzzles or learning a new musical instrument would be tougher for them.

For my father, I chose items which are not kiddish, feminine or western; so he would feel comfortable using them. The following are some of the suitable tools which keeps my retiree dad occupied at home. They prevents dementia or degenerative aging. Some of these games are fitting for elderly ladies too!


1. Memory Game

A very simple memory game to play with old folks.
 

I bought it from a push cart.

2. 3D Model Building

Building a cool Jeep gives my dad a great sense of accomplishment.
Planes, tanks and architecture models are available as well. Very affordable.

We intend to paint it together one of these days.

 

3. Tangoes Game

Dad gets creative as he think of ways to form the shapes with limited pieces given.
Solutions are provided in this booklet.

This game set is suitable for the elderly as it is thick enough for adults to hold and
magnetic features to prevent the Tangoes from dropping. Brilliant for long-distance travelling.

This game can be played when the senior is alone.

4. Wooden Block Puzzles

The pieces are labelled with numbers.

5. Building Game

Plastic construction toys that joined by magnets.
Fun way to get the mind and hands working!

6. Coloring

Retro-themed coloring activity book "My Kueh Lapis". 

7. Calligraphy

Dad practicing Chinese calligraphy using papers that can be reused.

I intend to introduce western calligraphy to him.

8. Mahjong

All time favorite social strategy game!
My mother-in-law plays Mahjong with her siblings weekly.

There are definitely many more ways to maintain an active healthy lifestyle, feel free to share additional senior activities ideas to me. 😊

8 Review Questions Before Cutting Toxic People Off

"I dropped people off with no warning, I getting too old to explain to others."
"Cut toxic people off immediately!"

I read memes like the above and it made me ponder – we do no hesitate to dispose things away when it's of no use to us nowadays, should we apply the same mindless attitude to our relationships?

For those who are active in social media, you might have the unfortunate experience of being unfriended by people. People whom you are clueless why they have blocked you. Nobody likes to be thrown away like dirt. It's sad and frustrating.

In the light of being fair, authentic and doing to other fellow humans how you would want to be treated, I propose we consider these 8 questions before we cut people off.

1. Have I feedback to this person about his/her negative behavior constructively? Feedback on the area how his/her actions affected others, without assuming they know they are in the wrong.

2. Have I bothered to learn how to handle him/her with care and respect?

3. Have I done anything to cause this person to react in this way to me?

4. Is this person always behaving negatively? Does he /she happen to be in low-points of their life and all they need is a kind soul to listen to how they feel or some space to be alone?

5. How can I help as a fellow human without affecting me?

6. Is it realistic to expect everyone to be always positive, upbeat and saying things that we want to hear?

7. Is this person simply irritating? Does he/she deserves to be unfriended?

8. Is this person abusive and manipulative? I totally agree that we have to set boundaries with harmful negative toxic people to protect ourselves. Flee from violent dangerous people if need be.

After considering the above and if we decided to end a relationship; TRY to close it amicably safely so that both parties could move on and learn positively from it. The world is small, we never know the relationship we end today might come in need tomorrow.

ADA Cafe

ADA Cafe Singapore

ADA cafe is set up by Alzheimer's Disease Association, Singapore. It is one awesome cafe build with love! Located at the sparkling new Agape Village, the menu is very affordable! The friendly team here serves western food. Let's give them the love and support they need! :)

A fatherly waiter took this photo for me

Tasty Ebi Prawn Pesto Pasta

Cheerful air-conditioned cafe

Western set lunch that cost less than S$10!

Address: 7A Lorong 8 Toa Payoh #01-01 Agape Village Singapore 319 264.

Opening Hours:
Mondays-Fridays: 8.30am- 5.30pm
Saturdays: 8.30am- 2pm.

Ambience: 9 out of 10.
The ambience is quiet, bright and cozy. Suitable for business meetings.

Cleanliness: 10 out of 10

Remarks: For those who are driving, park at Agape Village.

Is respect to be earned?

Many times, I've heard people exclaimed this phrase "respect is to be earned". Others might buy it as a valid reason. But I see it as an excuse for arrogance and defiant behavior.

Respect is base of every healthy relationship. A person who has good self-esteem and upbringing will regard others with respect. Why should others make extra effort to earn their basic respect? Jeez, who do they think they are? Would their commanders have to gain their respect first before instructing them to dig the trenches?

If a person is so calculative as not to give a fellow human the respect they deserve, or disregard the social graces of society, then I gathered this selfish arrogant person is not going to respect me unless it benefits them. Such a person is not going to be a sincere friend anyway. I will be happier without them.

We hear people feeling indignant all the time. Parents getting furious with their kids and vice versa... Colleagues feeling disgruntled among each other...  Nations putting embargo... all because of the lack of respect. I realized, respect is a huge word with chain consequences.

Having seen and heard from friends on how they felt when their boundaries are being pushed. Having to apologize to folks who I had unknowingly upset their feelings. I've learnt and gathered 5 areas to give respect to:

To get respect, show respect first.

With these keys in mind, let it guide our relationships peacefully.

Golden Days

Trust God's golden goodness overflowing abundantly in our lives.

During coffee shop talks, it is so easy to compare and lament how affordable standard of living was, and easier to earn a living during the 80s and 90s... While these "Good Ol' Days" conversations may seem harmless, constant exposure might affect our mindset in the long run— causing us to be more skeptical, uneasy and fearful.

Today, I woke up and saw the STI dropped. My waves of thoughts start to turn choppy. I felt the desire to pray and God reminded of me Psalm 23.6 — an uplifting, assuring promise that gives a mighty sense of tranquility. I felt much at ease after reading it and God prompted me to create the above poster to bless the folks online. 

Now that I am better aware, whenever I hear bad news, I would chose to focus on this precious promise of His and envision His bountiful supply of grace to continue to overflow in all my days. Hope this verse blesses your days too.

National Day

National Day is a day to celebrate the birth and success of a nation. It is also a time to give thanks for the peace and prosperity that we had enjoyed in the past, and pray for these two essential qualities to continue to last in Singapore.

Happy Earth Day

Thank God for this wonderful home call earth. It houses about 7 billion people.

God bless our one and only earth! 

Let's do our part to keep it beautiful, peaceful and safe!

Happy Women's Day

To all the pretty ladies who had made someone smile. Happy Women's Day!

Recycle Wheelchairs

The screws on my mum's wheelchair were rusty and loose. We wanted to buy her a new wheelchair and wondering how to dispose the old one when my resourceful sister told me about this organization.

Their office at a voideck of HDB

Mobility Aids Services & Training Centre
Address:  Blk 254 Tampines Street 21 #01-464 Singapore 521254
Tel: 67839023
Website: http://kampungsenang.org/

Opening hours:
9am to 5.30pm (Monday- Friday)
9am to 1pm (Sat)
Closed on Sunday and public holidays

Mobility Aids Services & Training Centre at Tampines is a charity organization that collects used wheel chairs, commodes, walking aids or hospital beds.  They even offer to collect these equipments from your home (within Singapore).

The room that used living aids are given  facelift

Mobility Aids Services & Training Centre will repair and refurbish the donated mobility aids/ hospital beds so that it is working well before they rent it out. In our aging society, organization like these serves 2 important purposes of defraying the cost of living aids for the needies and recycling to protect our earth's resources.

Many models to chose

We are for recycling. We gladly gave Mobility Aids Services & Training Centre Mum's old wheel chair so that they could revitalize it to be usable again.  They have a huge collection of living aids, some of them are relatively new! We decided to rent one from them instead of spending a few hundred dollars on a new one. The fee for renting a wheelchair is S$80- S$100. There is no time limit to the rental of their equipments. Excellent for folks who are terminally ill or immobile.

Mum's new horse

Mum tried on a few wheel chairs and selected this one which suits her height and lifestyle.

Thank God for organizations like these, they have to receive donations to support their operations. On this season of giving, let's donate to them (via their website) or share this post to create awareness about their services so that more can be blessed.

Save Money & Your Life: DIY Air Purification Against Haze

DIY Air Purification Against Haze 

Even since the haze started and gotten dangerous. The air purifiers went out of stock. Price of mask has reached all time high. Even spa salons offer the precious N95 mask for free with purchase of their spa package. We are told to stay indoors to prevent exposure to the polluted air.

But what can we do when we have no air conditioner or air purifier indoors?!

After much research, my boyfriend and I discovered that we can fix up an air filer with household items while keeping ourselves cool. Concept of Air purifiers is to trap the particles in the air on the filters paper. This means lower concentration of air pollutants will get into your body. We applied this theory and we used a fan cover to attach the filter papers to an electric fan.

DIY Home Air Purification System with fan cover and floor cleaning sheet.
Place the suggested air filters between the fan cover and the fan.

These materials are cheap and easily available.
A low income family can afford it.

For those who cannot find a suitable fan cover,
here is another version of DIY Home Air Purification System. 
Use a chair as the frame of the filters.
Stick the suggested air filters on the back support of the chair. 

We can use the following as filter papers:
1) HAPA filter papers for air purifiers
2) Dry disposable cleaning towels that homemakers use for sweeping the floor (Magic clean, Scott Brite)
3) Kitchen towels
4) even used N95 masks


The other important key to reducing the air pollutants in your house is to keep the windows closed. When there is an opening, use a wet towel or masking tape to seal the area. Put few pots of plants indoors to generate oxygen.

Hope these simple ideas helps to relieve us from the discomfort of the Haze and make the air in our home more breathable. It will be fun project for parents to engage their kids in too.

Anti-Haze

Singapore skies thick with haze

With PSI at new high of 321 due to the fires from neighbouring countries, I am concerned over the health and well-being of Singapore. Besides praying for rain to cool and cleanse the air, I am prompted to share these:

9 Protective Measures Against Haze

1. Drink more room-temperature water
   Avoid pouring cold water down your throat as it may induce cough in this harsh weather.
2. Eat more fruits
   To strengthen immunity, especially our lungs.
3. Stay in door
   Hide from the harsh and dry elements. Exercise at home or in the gym instead.
4. On the air conditioner
   Filter off the pollutants.
5. Clean aircon filter
   As the filter would be working doubly hard these few days.
6. Put indoor plants
   For natural fresh supply of oxygen in your room.
7. Leave a wet towel in your room
   Let the wet towel absorb the burnt particles in the air.
8. Invest in an air-purifying device
   Thanks to the wonders of technology, we could clean the air we are breathing at the press of a button. Do get those with filter papers that will trap the dusty air particles.
9. Wear mask when outdoor
   Do prepare eye drops in case the dryness stink your eyes.
   
   Why let the haze dull us up?! Now is the best time to shop for a comical mask. Or decorate our medical mask to cheer everyone up!

Prawn Mee 2

Naturally Addictive without MSG! At S$5 or $7, you get a healthy bowl of prawn mee without feeling thirsty or numbness on the mouth. Prawns are fresh! 

The Old Stall - Hokkien Street Famous Prawn Mee

(Hong Lim Food Centre)

Soup is naturally sweet!

Address: 

Hong Lim Complex 531A Upper Cross Street, #02-67, Singapore 051531

Opening hours: 8.30am - 3pm. Closed on Thursday.

Blk 120 Bukit Merah Lane 1 #01-58 Alexandra Village Singapore 150120.

Opening hours: 8am - 8pm

Traditional local recipe since 1943.

Recommends: 

1. Prawn Mee Soup –   The gold is in the soup! 

2. Curry powder –  They fried and grind the curry powder. Just right without being too peppery.

Ambience: 6 out of 10

Cleanliness: 7 out of 10

Remarks: 

They only serve with thick yellow noodles, kway teow or mee hoon. No mee kia or mee poh.

Anti-Bully

WKBT anchor Jennifer Livingston took a moment during 2nd Oct 2012's morning newscast to address a recent insensitive email from a viewer complaining about her physical size.

"To the person who wrote me that letter — do you think I don't know that? That your cruel words are pointing out something that I don't see?" Livingston asked in response. "You don't know me. You are not a friend of mine. You are not a part of my family. And you have admitted that you don't watch this show. So you know nothing about me but what you see on the outside. And I am much more than a number on the scale." She said, the hurt still raw in her voice.





I am so glad that she confronted the person who made critical, hurtful and stereotypical remarks.

Jennifer is a news caster, not a porn star. Why must she be slim? What is wrong with her size? Does being slim definitely equate being presentable? What has she done to make her a bad role model for young girls? Why can't women in media be appreciated for being kind, courageous and wise?

It is easy to pass sarcastic remarks to put others down. But victims have to take time, emotions and energy to recover from the scars. Some never get to recover as proper support is not rendered. Without healing, they might become defensive, dejected or detached. I wish people will be more mindful of the effects of their words.

I have friends who eat normal healthy portion per meal and exercise regularly, but they are still size XL. Due to career, family commitment and health reasons, it is not practical for them to go for extreme dieting. It would be unfair to judge them as being lazy due to their build.

If you want the best for someone you cared about, understand them before we give them comments. If certain areas can be improved, motivate them with grace. This is how we could treat people with care and respect. Saw this comment on Facebook and I so agree with what the author Jason said: Be a buddy not bully.

October is Anti-Bully month, let's spread this message to encourage words of kindness, acceptance and wisdom.

7 Stages of Post Break Up

It was really nice of Radio station 938 to invite me down to share tips on emotional wellness over the airwaves on 16 July 2012. I thought it might be interesting to share with the listeners on breaking up, something usually painful and not easy to get over. One way of coping through such difficult times which may seem like a maze is to simplify it into 7 Stages of Post Break Up.  After breaking down it down into more manageable parts, we find ways to deal with them one at a time. I may have bitten a little bit more than I could chew as I was trying to explain over a 20-minute interview in nutshell on a topic which is better understood over a 1-day session that I conduct through interactive discussion.


1. Shock
The news of the break up comes as a sudden proverbial stab to the heart, to say the least.  The pain feels real enough though you cannot find any blood flowing out from your skin anywhere. But you may and usually find uncontrollable tears flowing out from you. You tell yourself, “This couldn't be happening to me!” And your body goes in a figurative state of shock, which feels real enough to those going through the break up. This sudden end in a relationship is a huge blow to your emotions and your senses shuts off to protect you from the pain. You feel numbness like a zombie, become totally disconnected from your surroundings, and your sense of time is lost, as likely will your appetite. You are in a state of confusion. You have difficulty in focusing on your studies if you are schooling, work if you are working. And even simple daily activities like eating, sleeping, writing your emails or adding a few numbers become disrupted as is your efficiency to carry them out. Some people may resort to alcohol or binging to distract themselves from the pain or numb themselves further.


2. Hope
After a somewhat recovery from the initial shock, the reality of the break up sets in. You refuse to accept the fact that he or she has left you and you desperately explore ideas, ways and possibilities to woo your ex-lover to come back.

You go all out to buy expensive gifts, perform acts of kindness and promise to repent for your past mistakes (even if they do not exist or know exactly what they are) to save the relationship. You attempt all possible ways to prove your love and get him or her back. You call and message your ex, hoping the relationship will revert to those perfect loving days. Some may do silly things; which is highly not recommended— like threaten to end their lives or injure themselves to get a response and hopefully, an ideal reconciliation from their lovers — I will not go into details but I am sure you have probably read one or two in the newspapers.

3. Rage
Now your dream of your happy marriage or future one is gone in a wisp of smoke. You are furious towards your ex-lover for spoiling the beautiful union that you worked out in your head. Blame him or her for causing you to be lonely single again. At this stage, emotions are raw with sudden outburst like crying, yelling or slamming of things. Out of revenge, some may expose compromising photos or videos of their ex online, which we as their friends sometimes unfortunately end up seeing.  Others might badmouth their ex, with the intention of making the ex suffer the way you had, and preferably more. Your actions frighten people, including the people around and ultimately yourself, when you reflect.

4. Bitterness
You are tired of crying, raging and trying to get him or her back. The energy has turned from hot-headed rage to cold bitterness as the reality settles in. You may have come to terms that this relationship is over. However the break up leaves  you scarred and scared of the world out there.  You become overly cautious, skeptical and biased about relationships. You may blame society or yourself for allowing this break up to happen. At this stage, ladies might generalize men as shallow, men may deemed women as materialistic. People around you can feel the negative vibes oozing out from you. Some acquaintance distanced themselves from you as they are uncomfortable with your self-absorbed, whiny and sarcastic disposition. Some people never leave this stage, which is an even bigger tragedy.

5. Dejection
Your self-esteem is bruised and you start to doubt your attractiveness and self worth. You see yourself as a social failure, sink into depression and feel sorry for yourself. You shun social activities, especially gatherings that involve couples and relatives. You have lost the confidence to socialize and no see the purpose to meet new friends. You are also afraid to go to places that you and your ex had been, for fear of evoking memories you had together. You carry a cloud of sadness and regret, bringing everything around you a notch down wherever you go. Friends and family wishes to bring you out and set you up for dating but you are too caught in your own sorrow and fears of failure to meet new friends. Even if you happen to meet someone suitable, you will not consider dating. I have met people who are stuck at this stage for years, which is a big shame.  I had a lady client who came to see me as she has not dated since her last break up 7 years ago. Before she knows it, she is already 39 year old (Luckily through help from LoveAgain, her emotional wellness is established. Now she is happily dating.).

6. Closure
The dark gloomy feelings have cleared. You reflect the past relationship and understand why it didn’t work rationally. There is control over emotional responses when you see your ex. You can even wish him or her happiness if you see them again. You accept that break up as part of your life, you learn from it positively and close this chapter of your life. You enjoy your independence, peace and confidence. You may be alone but do not feel lonely anymore. You feel more like a whole, peaceful and happy person again. This is the stage where the emotional baggages, stigmas or unrealistic expectations about relationships are greatly reduced if not totally shed. You are on the path to happiness!


7. Envision
The past experience had made you stronger and wiser with most of the bitterness gone. Your family and friends are delighted to see your new found ease, maturity and zeal. Your emotions evolve healthily and looked forward to developing connections on romantic level. You evaluate your criteria in looking for a life partner clearly and are willing to change your checklist base on suitability, wholesomeness and truthfulness. You can imagine the type of person you want to marry again. You are willing to share your life with others. You are open to dates, trust and love again! You decorate your calendar with social events to enlarge your network and catch up with old pals. You anticipate a wonderful, fulfilling and happy future.

Please note that this article was written based on general cases I’ve seen. These 7 Post Break Up stages are usually faced by most. However, not all the stages may occur to everyone nor follow the same sequential order. Some stages last longer than the other. But what is important is to seek assistance and get someone trained to support you in tough times like this.

Heartbreak is a complex event. It involves deep levels of healing and it is necessary to work with someone who can act as your mirror, to show you where you have been fractured and who can apply the correct intervention to help you heal in hours what would have taken years to recover. I encourage you to speak to a trained coach in heart break to help you manage your painful emotions and move on.

At LoveAgain, our heart break therapy consists of 7 stages of healing process to enable you to forgive, remove an emotional trauma, heal painful memories and gain a new perspective on life, feel like a whole person, have a vision of good healthy love, get empowered to pursue the vision and make better choices and attract the suitable people.

A single session at LoveAgain.sg allows you to let go of past hurt, anger and betrayal. Click here to find out more…

Chinese Soup

To stay slim, I like to keep my dinner light. Very happy to find a place which serves traditional chinese herbal soup with home-cooked feel. Their black bean pork soup taste exactly like my mum's. Boyfriend and I ordered a soup, a fried dou-miao and 2 rice. Total about S$10. Definately a gem for the gourmets who are health and cost consious!

Chinese comfort food

They serve variety of tasty nourishing soup. Benefits of the soups are explained.

Earth Jar Treasure
Address: 77 Eating House, Blk 22 Sin Ming Road Singapore 570022
Opening hours: Mon - Sat, 10am - 9.30pm
                       Sun, 10am - 3pm

Recommends:
1. Duck Soup - Rare find!
2. Black bean pig tail's soup - Source of protein, especial good for kids.
3. Fried Dou-miao - Healthy, crunchy. Goes well with the soups.
4. Mushroom rice -  Perfect compliment to their soups.

Giant Soup Jars

Ambience: 8 out of 10

Cleanliness: 8 out of 10

Remarks:
Must try for chinese soup lovers!
Spacious kopitiam well-equipped with ceiling fans to cool the guests. Do go early to enjoy more choices. Yesterday when we were there, business is so good, only 1 type of soup left.

7 ways to stay youthful

During my events, I met many people. I’m surprised to find some of them look so much younger than their age. Being inquisitive, I asked for their secrets to maintain youthfulness. Besides drinking enough water to hydrate, keeping active and eating balanced diet, here are 7 golden tips that I've gathered. They are applicable to both men and women:

1. HAIR
Singapore’s humid and sunny weather increases sweat production and cause the scalp to feel greasy. Through my conversations with some youthful looking mature men with healthy head of hair, I discovered they have the common habit of shampooing their hair only once in two days. To keep it clean, they rinse their hair daily.

2. SKIN
Avoid harsh skincare products which can cause skin irritation, accelerate skin aging and make it look leathery. In order to choose the right skin care, identify your skin type and use suitable products. Your skin should feel clean not tight, itchy or dry after cleansing and toning.

3. WRINKLES
When you feel your brows are knitted together due to concentration, pinch your brows lightly to reduce stress and prevent vertical lines formed between the brows. Pinch the brows in an outward direction.

4. LIPS
When our lips are dry, we are tempted to lick it. This dries the lips further as saliva removes moisture. Apply lip balm instead. Carry it with you and apply it whenever you feel the need to hydrate your lips.

5. COLD SHOWER
If you can take it, cold shower water tones the body and activates the lymphatic system.

Get active and social!

6. MENTAL CHALLENGE
Engage your brain regularly– learn a new language, pick up new hobbies or read more books. It will brighten your thinking, up your mental abilities, empower you to react fast and prevent memory loss. Physical exercises strengthen your body. Likewise, mental exercises benefit your brain.

7. INTERACT
Youthful looking people has open, optimistic outlook and keep their energy high by interacting with others.  They enjoy talking to people and the chatting makes them more relaxed and joyful. Get social regularly to stay cheerful. You get to make new friends, stay in touch with old pals and family too!

Chess

After running an international chess workshop for Clique Wise today, I realised 5 benefits of this age-old game.

Marco, from The Chess School, was explaining the game rules and strategies.

Benefits of Playing Chess:

1) Brain Health
Mental exercise is as important as physical exercise. Playing chess stimulates thinking and stretch our brain muscles, thereby improving our memory and helping us to be mentally alert to make decisions better and faster. Unlike mah-jong which has the risk of losing money, chess is a wholesome game to protect the mental faculties of senior citizens from degenerating.

2) Learning abilities
Research has shown that playing chess enhances learning development of kids. This game cultivates analytical reasoning ability and problem-solving skills; which is especially useful in mathematics and science.

3) Concentration
Build mental endurance as the game requires the players to stay calm and focused over long period of time.

4) Understand other's character
As we observe our opponent's facial expression and body language during the chess game, we get to know them more, as such we could manage the relationship better.

5) Social
Research has shown that playing chess fosters confidence, self-esteem and social skills. With healthy brain, we are able to establish more meaningful relationships.

Chess is a brilliant, interactive and fascinating game that enriches the mind and our social experience with people. A well fought game can be a fulfilling experience. Hope more will pick up this game, enjoy and favour from it!

My second game of chess. Thanks to all the coaching, White won.
To make the learning more interesting, I challenged the trainers to help Black win.

Rediffusion

Rediffusion will be going off the air come April 30. Rediffusion is a subscription radio that has a long history in Singapore. Since 1949, Rediffusion served the community, providing news, information as well as quality listening entertainment.

Their audience are mainly dialect speaking Chinese age 40 and above. I am honoured to have the opportunities to be interviewed during the VIP programme last December and this year's Valentine’s Day. I used Hokkien phrases freely on air and spoke about how parents could play a supportive role instead of pressurizing their children to get married.

Lydia outside the studio

Between the interviews, Teochew songs were played. The DJ and I casually chatted about the issues that old folks face in Singapore. We agree that Singapore has evolved so fast over the last 15 years that the illiterate folks find it tough to keep up with times.

My relatives in their 70s feedback why they feel cooped up at home. There have been so many new buildings and roads that they are afraid to get lost. They could not take public transport as they do not understand English, neither are they tech-savvy to use maps or GPS.  The safest way for them to commute alone out of their area is through taxi; which may be pricy for some of the retirees. As such they spend most of their time at home listening to Rediffusion.

While their kids and grand-kids are busy with work and school. Rediffusion has empowered these old folks mentally and emotionally. The dialect language is something they can relate to and it comforts them. If this radio service is gone, they will feel more lost, lonely and detached from society. Sincerely hope this station will be kept to accompany the old folks through their sunset years.

If it is not sustainable to keep Rediffusion due to commercial reasons, maybe MCYS can consider collaborating with Mediacorp to fill in this gap — a dialect radio station to meet the needs of the illiterate folks and senior citizens. It will be an avenue for youngsters to pick up their dialect and communicate with their grand parents too. There are more than 10 radio channels in Singapore. One dialect station will not dilute Mandarin or English language abilities but enrich Singapore's culture and make Singaporeans feel more connected to our roots.

A Simple Life

Movie Review from a caregiver's perspective

A Simple Life/桃姐/Sister Peach
Starring Andy Lau & Deanie Yip
Language: Mandarin with English & Chinese substitles

This reality of old age and death is something that glamour addicted silverscreen movie goers should avoid. Even the award-winning movie The Green Mile only manages to brush the surface on this subject. But in A Simple Life, director Ann Hui explores this subject subtly with depth and pockets of humour. It is quietly touching yet powerfully real… so real that the melodramatic scenes expected in a typical commercial film is unnecessary.

The only good thing about Tao-Jie’s stroke is bridging Roger and her closer. Without domestic help and a nagging voice at home, Roger learnt to be more appreciative of Tao-Jie. In the process of taking care of her, it strengthened the affinity between them. In fact, he was more attached to her than with his own mother. Tao-Jie is blessed to have Roger to cushion her sunset days with kindness, financial support and humour.

I could so empathise with how Roger the caregiver felt. My mum and I became closer when she suffered a stroke as well. After the stroke, mum was hospitalised and was unable to speak for weeks. I visited her in the hospital almost daily, applied moisturizer on her hands, lip balm on her dry lips caused by the air-con and prayed with her. She couldn’t speak then but look at me with gratitude. Mum has since recovered and is back home, she is able to speak and walk a little. Now, my siblings and I made regular effort to bring my parents out for dates. We appreciate every moment spent with them. Sincerely thank God that mum does not have to stay in the hospice like Tao-Jie.

I didn’t cry during the movie, but teared on the way driving home. In hind sight, I felt it must have been really tough for the caregivers to shoulder this burden, especially alone. They have to cope with stresses of career and family, bring in the dough to foot the medical bills and face the fear of losing their loved ones. In addition, it can be frustrating when dealing with old folks’ stubbornness— mainly caused by their inability to verbalise their vulnerability, pride and hopelessness. The old, invalid and sickly can be refered to the professionals, social welfare and charities for help. But who can the caregivers turn to for emotional support? For caregivers who are single, what happens when their “baby” is gone (death or senile)? Deep down, they must have wondered who will support them when it’s their turn to face the solitude of declining years.

This is a thought-provoking movie that resonates with people with aging, dependent and ill family member; it tacitly unveiled social issues of baby-boomers and the truths of Hong Kong hospice services. Definitely deserves many awards!

Date-friendly:
Although the movie is pleasantly filmed, this topic might be a little too heavy for first 3 dates.

Tips:
If possible, catch the Cantonese version as the essence of the Hong Kong culture will be better captured.

Lydia's Ratings:
8 out of 10 stars.

Release Date:
Singapore - 8 Mar 2012, Thursday

Trailer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMCoxooxQoI