7 Film-Inspired Expressions of Love
Discover your partner’s secret love lingo, and radically transform your couple life.
Ever wondered why you are unable to win the heart of your love interest, or why your long-term relationship seems to be stagnating? If you have been working hard at your relationship to no avail, your language of love may be lost in translation.
While love is a universal need, each of us speaks and understands it differently. The trick is to learn what works best for your partner.
Each person has a few preferred ways of expressing and experiencing love. Learning your partner’s love lingo will help you better appreciate everyday gestures. It will also enable you to better express your love effectively and build a deeper sense of intimacy.
By analysing some of the best romantic movies of our times, we show you how to crack the love code. You will be surprised at how much more fulfilling your relationship can be.
#1 ACTS OF LOVE
Movie Inspiration: The Intern
New-age stay-at-home dad Matt gives up his career to support his wife Jules while she builds her e-commerce fashion empire. This good-looking SNAG cooks, cleans and cares for their daughter.
While most of us don’t have the luxury of quitting our jobs to support our partner’s dreams, small daily acts of kindness is one of the key ways practical people express love. It could be something as run-of-the-mill as ironing clothes, brewing herbal soup or taking the initiative to wash the family car.
If you are on the receiving end of such acts of love, be sure to show appreciation. More importantly, make an effort to reciprocate, and do it with love. This is especially relevant to husbands and boyfriends, since women still tend to do more household chores and shoulder more childcare responsibilities. In fact, some studies suggest that men who help out with household chores enjoy more and better sex.
#2 WORDS OF LOVE
Movie Inspiration: Shakespeare in Love
This film explores the fictitious and forbidden love between William Shakespeare and a noble woman Viola. Viola’s love for literature and theatre, as well as Shakespeare’s poetic love declarations create instant sparks.
There is tremendous power in constantly and openly affirming each other, especially for people who prefer to express and experience love verbally. Of course, not everyone is comfortable with dramatic love declarations, so there is really no need to recite a sonnet. A simple ‘I love you’ in the morning or at night can do wonders for your relationship.
Be generous with your compliments as well. If your partner looks wonderful in a new haircut or outfit, be sure to point it out. Or, if he cooks your favourite dish and picks you up at work, make it a point to tell him how much you appreciate it.
#3 INTELLECTUAL CONNECTION
via GIPHY
Movie Inspiration: Before Sunrise
Can you fall madly in love with a stranger? Apparently you can. Jesse and Céline meet on a train departing from Budapest and strike up a conversation. They end up spending the night roaming Vienna, and talking about love, religion and life. By the end of the night, they have fallen in love.
We are all drawn to people we naturally ‘click’ with. However, for intellectual types who appreciate witty banter, humour and the exchange of ideas, such connections are extremely important.
If your partner fits the bill, it is vital to engage him or her regularly. Discuss ideas, find common grounds, understand each other’s quirks, and don’t be afraid to tease and banter with each other good-naturedly. Making an effort to read widely also helps you remain intellectual equals and provides fodder for meaningful conversations.
#4 THOUGHTFUL GIFTS
Movie Inspiration: The Terminal
Viktor, a Krakozhia refugee stranded at JFK International Airport, falls in love with a beautiful flight attendant Amelia. To woo her, he orchestrates an intimate dinner, and even miraculously constructs a majestic fountain with materials gathered at the airport.
Gifts can be powerful expression of love for some. But don’t max out your credit card on designer goods just yet. Take a leaf from Tom Hank’s character in The Terminal – a gift doesn’t have to be expensive or extravagant as long as it is thoughtful.
Word of advice: since people in this category tend to value the time and effort put into gifting, don’t get lazy and just grab a gift voucher. Surprise your partner with tickets when his favourite band is in town, or present her with a rose during special occasions such as your dating or marriage anniversary. For extra brownie points, make time for gift-wrapping!
#5 TOUCH OF AFFECTION
Movie Inspiration: Ghost
In case you haven’t watched this oldie, it tells the story of a happy couple Sam and Molly who are suddenly separated when Sam is murdered. He returns as a ghost, and struggles to communicate with Molly who can no longer see, hear or feel him.
For some people, a gentle touch on the shoulder, pat on the back, hug and kiss can be extremely meaningful. It conveys physical affection and intimacy. It can also be very reassuring and help your partner feel secure in your love.
Do not confuse this with sex though – in fact, most of your interactions may not even take place in the bedroom. It could be something as simple as sitting close to each other while watching television, giving each other goodbye kisses or hugs every day, or holding hands. If you did not grow up in a family that practises such physical proximity, it might take some adjustments to make yourself available and accessible to your partner, but it will be well worth it.
#6 BONDING TIME
Movie Inspiration: Up
Who can forget the poignant and heartbreaking first 10 minutes of Up when Ellie and Carl met and fell in love? There were no noisy declarations or dramatic demonstrations of love. It was quiet, old-fashion love – they simply did everything together and grew old together.
Spending time to connect as a couple is extremely important for some. This could be as clichéd as having a date night every week, enjoying an evening walk together, cooking together, or enjoying a nightcap together daily.
Remember, the key is to ensure that you are spending quality time as a couple. In other words, turn off your smart phone, put down your iPad, and give each other undivided attention.
#7 SEXUAL INTIMACY
Movie Inspiration: No Strings Attached
As its name suggests, this movie is about two friends, Emma and Adam, who agree to be sex buddies with no strings attached. Naturally, they fail and end up falling head over heels for each other.
Sex is an important part of most relationships – it helps to keep the spark alive between couples so that they don’t start to see each other as roommates or friends over time. For some, it is also vital to convey love, acceptance and affirmation.
That said, don’t see sex as an obligation. Spice up your sex life by trying it in different places, experimenting with different positions, or even investing in some fun sex toys such as a fluffy handcuff or blindfold. Some excitement in the bedroom can create a deeper sense of intimacy and trust, and establish a stronger connection with your partner.
Hope this 7 expressions of love re-ignite your romance!